Thursday, May 21, 2009

Vince. <3

Today was the day you left, said your good byes and left a hole in each of our hearts. You meant so much to me in the short time we spent together. I sacraficed Uni to spend more time with you, and i dont regret it, but i wish only you had been able to stay. In the short time that you've lived with us, you've certainly changed our family, it felt more like a family, we did things together, ate together, watched tv together and laughed together.

If i wasnt too busy trying to pull myself together and not cry infront of the friends that were there i would have said thanks for making me not feel alone, its great to have someone around, just there, when im watching tv, and you come, it just takes away that lonely feeling, msning with you behind my back and eating and laughing. Im gona miss you so much. When we left the airport, i could feel everything sinking in, i didnt cry infront of our friends but i got teary, and i gues you meant more to me than i realised, i caught the J2 back to paradise and a youth leader came on the bus, he askd me where i was coming from and as i told him, "from the airport, you know vince? he just got deported back" and i could feel my voice cracking. He askd "back to where?" and i broke down, i couldnt even say one word, "Phelpanes (Philipines)" and thats when i realised i dont care anymore, i cried infront of a packed bus with everybody staring at me, but thats how much you've influenced me.

Memories flashing back and i cant stop thinking, town just seems so lonely in itself now, i dont care how many friends i have but, when im leaving town id would get a phone call or a txt mesage from you asking about dinner or karaoke, and catching the bus home knowing that somebody i knew might be on the same bus just felt so good. I just got a phone call from darren youth leader, thought i was a new guy and i didnt know who he was and then turned out he was the guy i sat with on the bus. i broke down again. trying to pull myself back together to finnish this blog.

Lost my wallet the other day, and spent the only money i could find stuffing around my room with ice cream and chocolate, man i wish you were here, its so quiete and lonely now. I cant believe you've impacted me so much, dont care how queer i sound, but you mean so much to me specially for a guy. Keep following God always and we'll cross paths again, because this isnt how its suppose to end, we're not suppose to lose someone like you, like this. this is bullshit, and i object to watever the devils done.

Ive seriously had the worse week this week, lost my wallet, guai lous fucking me off, and getting sick again and a gayed up hair cut and it gets even worse. im leaving it here will continue it another time.

i'll miss you so much, its back to lonely days and back to the sounds of silent. You meant so much to me in the little time you had left, and i pray you will always be blessed, because you are a blessing yourself. Much love always Vince. ♥ You've simply touched us all, heart and soul. (Y)

much love always.

Dont ask why that picture is sideways, i dont know.

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