I swear i can make anyone i wanted, to laugh, i can make them smile, i can bring them joy. But when they're down, i can't do these things well. I'm suppose to be able to do these things, im suppose to be the hero. As cliche as that sounds, im suppose to be that kind of life saver. I hate showing that i care when i do, to anyone that is. God i hope things get better soon. It's like as soon as im on holidays im back at work, being there for others, i love it, but sometimes life throws something unexpected at you, and its going to be the toughest of them all. Its your best friend, and you know that you have to be there for them, yet at the same time, you feel you cant do much beause everyone else is doing the same. And as your priority, you're suppose to beable to save them despite how inexperienced you are, your suppose to keep their eyes towards the light. Your suppose to carry their world for them while they're exausted.
While i was out having an awesome time last night. You were facing the hardest moment of your life so far. If i had a mobile, maybe someone would have told me. I feel so guilty when i shouldnt. I wish i could be more helpful, more wise, more capable. We all know things will get better, but its time we dont want to spend on making it better. Its what reminds us that makes it hard, and knowing that things only get harder makes it worse. It's like mountain climbing without the safety belt. Everythings at the bottom of us, and if we fall, we fall to lose it all. And its that little thing that knowing you could be right that remains in your mind even though you were right. Its the little things you let slide that finally comes together into one gigantic thing.
Dam i wanted it to go well for you. I'll keep you in my prayers, for sure.