The day before my oral presentation and the due date for my assignment, i get side tracked by.... very stupid things, i swear im refraining to swear. So dam furious with some people and other simple small and big matters, i have a huge adrenaline rush, i feel like smacking my wall, but i dont want my hands to be shaking and all bruised in my presentation tommorow.
like seriously, when am i going to stop putting others before me? Im not a magic man, i cant do everything and have everything work out just the way they want it to. Honestly give me a break, im trying and im trying, theres a limit to what i can handle and a limit to what i can do, but im still trying, im tyring... cant ppl bloody see im fkn trying.
Put them first priority, make sure they;re alrite, do what yu can, as long as they're good, i'll be fine. Its like im running and running and the finnishing line is in sight, and as i get closer, these things get in my way and im slowly geting more distanced from it. at this pace, im never going to cross it.
Put others first, put others first, put others first, i'll manage somehow, because my fk tard of a father wasnt able to, I'll be the better of him. its like im trying to do 5 things at once, in a time frame and do it successfully. I swear, i need propper sleep, and a long break from family and a funny movie before i lose my mind and rage at ppl i dont want to.
For now, i'll refrain, try my best to refrain. It'll all by past in a few hours sleep. At the least, look at and appreciate the ammount of things im trying to do at once, just because i care. Dont pressure me, or ask me, if i say i'll do it, i'll do it, if i give you my word, i mean it. dont bloody doubt me or think less of me, because im doing something else before i get to yours. Im just one person, who carries too many passengers.
I look like shit these days, eye bags, pimples, anger management, tiredness. Just leave me alone for a day or two.